Is coaching earning a bad name?

Let me try and answer it in a somewhat constructive manner.

Truth is that coaching works and is extremely efficacious.

However, like any other professional service, bad news always travels much faster than good news. It is true that many sponsors and coachees are dissatisfied and are certainly saying bad things about coaching and their experiences of having worked with or interacted with coaches.

I would like to step back and dip into our 19 years of experience of having worked with clients, managed over 2000+ paid coaching engagements and try and understand what is causing these gaps. .

The first gap is what I call the consultation gap. Before you have a coaching dialogue, it is important for the coach or the coach solution provider to have a consultative dialogue to understand the stated and unstated needs of clients.

The second is what I call the installation gap. How do we design the whole solution and install it in the client organization so that it is set up for success. This calls for a lot of collaborative efforts including education and alignment.

The third is what I call the competence gap, the gap between whatever you have designed and what you actually deliver.

Now there are many things one can say about competence. First, credentials do not equal competence – just because I have a certificate does not make me a competent coach.

Second, there is something called contextual competence. Many years ago, a very young person used to work in my team, and he used to tell me that his dream was to become a marriage counselor. I said, yes, first you need to get married and deal with your own marriage before you can counsel others on marriage.

Zero understanding of context actually can lead to poor contextual competence.

There is just one more thing I’d like to say here. That is what Jagdish Seth and others wrote in the book Clients for Life. They call it professional independence and they look at three dimensions: Financial independence, intellectual independence, emotional independence.

Finally, is the satisfaction gap. There is a certain understanding, there is a certain design, there is a certain competence, but finally whatever you do can lead to dissatisfaction if the client is not clear about what they actually had in mind.
How do I ensure that I am candid with stakeholders about how we are making progress? How do we ensure there is scope to course correct to ensure that we are realistic of outcomes or we work together to enhance and raise the bar?

So if we address these four gaps, I think we can try and reduce the kind of negative perception that today exists about coaching.

It’s very tough to be a leader today. They need help and coaches can help, but you cannot just get into a room and have a conversation and assume that coaching will work.

Youtube Link: https://youtu.be/QqZYRNW5jP0

Influencing as a Competency

Influence in a layman’s context is often viewed in a negative connotation – beat a fair process using money or muscle power – political influence, financial influence, etc . But in the Leadership parlance it is seen as a much-needed competence and most of the successful Leaders are influential.

“Influence” as a leadership competency refers to the ability of a leader to positively impact others, persuade them to support their ideas, and gain buy-in from key individuals, essentially meaning the power to affect the behaviour and decisions of others within a team or organization to achieve desired outcomes. It is considered a core element of effective leadership as without the ability to influence, a leader cannot drive change or achieve goals effectively.

As a Leader, one also observes that among the Team Members, some are definitely more influential than the others and are able to leave a lasting impression among the Leader and other Team members. So, it is also a quality for any Team Member, not necessarily only for the Leaders.

Some Key points about influence as a leadership competency:

• Experts consider “influence” to be the very essence of leadership, as it’s the ability to motivate and guide others towards a shared vision.
• Influence goes beyond just using positional power; it involves building trust, credibility, and strong relationships to persuade others.
• Effective communication, including active listening and clear articulation of ideas, is crucial to exert positive influence.
• Understanding and managing one’s own emotions, as well as recognizing and responding to the emotions of others, enhances the ability to influence.

A real example

I remember listening to Padman – Arunachalam Muruganandhan in my office campus years ago. Hailing from a poor family in Tamil Nadu, he innovated on Sanitary Napkins for the bottom of the pyramid, from scratch and went on to be listed among the world’s top 100 influencers by Times Magazine. He was proudly claiming that even with his not so good spoken English, he got the maximum time of 1.5 hours to chat with Bill Gates the then Microsoft CEO. He was challenging our organisation as to how innovation could happen in a room and not out of a desperate need in the Gemba. This is a really appealing example how influential one can get not necessarily out of formal education and professional experience but driven by the need to succeed.

How to demonstrate influence as a leader:

• Articulate a compelling vision:
  Clearly communicate the goals and benefits of a proposed plan to gain buy-in.
• Build relationships:
  Foster trust and rapport with team members by actively listening and showing genuine interest in their perspectives.
• Be Accessible
  Be easily approachable and accessible to your peers and teams.
• Tailor approach to individuals:
  Understand different motivations and communication styles to adapt your influence strategy accordingly.
• Leverage expertise:
  Utilize your knowledge and experience to provide valuable insights and support for others’ ideas. Influencing is also about being able to realise others’ ideas
• Facilitate collaboration:
  Encourage open dialogue and actively involve team members in decision-making processes.

Coaching to influence

Influence as a required competence to be developed is often observed on Coachees either directly or often threaded along with other improvement areas like Assertiveness, leading from the front, Team Player, etc. Influencing helps in all these areas. While influencing comes naturally to some Leaders, it is definitely something that the Coach can help the Coachee to practise and improve through specific exercises and Tools.

Are you influential ?
Test yourself to convince someone or get something done which is in the normal course not straight forward. One of my colleagues from Sales always takes up a challenge on the dining table to make someone eat one count more than what he or she planned or ordered to eat, to prove he is a real Sales guy and he most of the times succeeded.

Practice positive influencing and it’s a great competency to have in all walks of life.

About the Author

Sriram is a Leadership coach focused on business acceleration, talent management and people leadership. He is a Management Consultant and the Practice Head of Prominent Mind Consultants.

He has been Vice President of a strong multinational company – HR Strategy, and Head of Human Resources.

Why and I afraid to tell you who you are?

What comes in the way of building and nurturing authentic relationships at work or in our personal lives?

What comes in the way of being honest with another person, albeit in a responsible way?

This is a topic I certainly grapple with all the time I am sure many of you do.

To answer this question, I am drawn to one of the very, very first books on this subject I read, well over 40 years ago, written by John Powell SJ, published in 1969. And the book goes by the title “Why Am I Afraid to Tell You Who I Am?”

He actually asks a total stranger this question, “Why am I afraid to tell you who I am?”

He asks, “Can you answer this question?”

And that other person says, unrehearsed, “I’m afraid to tell you who I am because if I tell you who I am, you may not like who I am and it’s all that I have.”

That is the kind of fear that prevents people from being authentic in self-disclosure.

If I turn the question around a little bit and ask, “Why am I afraid to tell you who I think you are and what you’re doing?” what would be your answers?

I’d really like to read your responses here.

I’d like to start by sharing a few first:

✅I’m not sure how to say it to you. I don’t think I have that skill.

✅It’s too much work. I just don’t have the bandwidth to get into this.

✅It may spoil the transactional relationship that is keeping us going.

✅You may not like what I am going to say.

✅You may disagree with what I am saying and end up rejecting me and therefore it appears convenient to not tell you who I think you are but carry that impression in my mind forever, judging you every single day.

I’d really love to know why you are afraid to tell someone who they are and what they do?
Youtube link: https://youtu.be/WvF4xLVL5W8
Video Link: https://www.dropbox.com/scl/fi/4gf0o6i4zo08qv0krxjei/Building-and-Nurturing-Authentic-Relationship.mp4?rlkey=mkz0wxawj8opyj71pnzb6skdd&st=fel0sg84&dl=0

“I realized that the beliefs that had held Ranjit back for decades were starting to crumble. Lecturing him about the flaws in his mindset would not have made a difference; he needed to experience it himself. This personal discovery echoed the core principles of design thinking—prototype, test, and learn.”

Prototyping and testing serve as the crucial final stages within the design thinking (DT) framework. In product development, teams create working prototypes and test them with end users to gather feedback. In the context of executive coaching, however, these stages revolve around implementing identified actions as experiments, observing whether behaviours change and transform over time.

Going back to the Coachee Ranjit discussed in part-II, the reason Ranjit would not take up new projects and seemingly challenging assignments was his fear of failure. During the coaching discussions, we discovered that Ranjit believed that he was not good at taking up new challenges. He wanted to play safe by not getting involved in new things, though he had all the capabilities to do so. It was a deep-rooted belief.

Due to the pandemic, my coaching sessions with Ranjit were conducted virtually. During one of the conversations, I noticed that Ranjit’s son, a boy of age about ten, was often disturbing the discussions. Ranjit was apologetic, and I comforted him saying that it was fine, since the home was not meant to be the place of work. Then I asked him what was his son pestering about. Ranjit said that his son wanted to eat Pizza and unfortunately due to pandemic, they were not able to go out to a restaurant or order. That gave me an idea. I asked “Ranjit, I understand your situation, poor boy he wants to eat Pizza, Why don’t you make one at home?”. Ranjit was petrified “I have never made a Pizza; I don’t even know the method “

“Ranjit, I know you enjoy cooking, and you mentioned in our very first session that it’s a passion of yours,” I said. He paused before responding, “Yes, but I have never made a pizza.”

“Why not give it a try for your son’s sake?” I suggested, hoping to spark some enthusiasm.

His scepticism was palpable. “It will not turn out well; pizza making is an art! I have never even baked anything. I only know how to make Indian cuisine.”

In that moment, I could sense the deep-seated belief that was holding him back. I pressed on gently, “What if it does not come out well? Will your son refuse to eat it?”

Ranjit hesitated. “He might eat it, but…”
“But what?” I encouraged him to dig a little deeper.
“What will he think of me?” That was it, his true fear showed up.
I decided to push “ Ranjit, In the current situation where your son cannot get a Pizza, will he appreciate you for making it or think low about you ?”

Ranjit agreed to do an experiment. I asked him to journal his current state of mind, his concerns, his worries, his journey of Pizza making and the result of the experiment with his son. Though our next session was a few weeks away, Ranjit called me two days later. He was excited to share that he had made Pizza at home. I asked him how he had gone about it.

Ranjit had meticulously studied countless recipes and watched numerous videos on “How to Make Authentic Restaurant-Style Pizza at Home.” Finally, he mustered the courage to take the plunge. I inquired, “How did it turn out? What was your son’s reaction?”

Ranjit could not conceal his excitement, “It came out so much better than I expected! My son loved it and is already asking me to make it again.”

In that moment, I realized that the beliefs that had held Ranjit back for decades were starting to crumble. Lecturing him about the flaws in his mindset would not have made a difference; he needed to experience it himself. This personal discovery echoed the core principles of design thinking—prototype, test, and learn.

The success of his pizza experiment and the genuine appreciation from his son instilled in Ranjit a newfound confidence. He felt empowered to explore new possibilities, both in the kitchen and at work.

Design thinking views the entire cycle as an iterative process rather than a linear journey. This perspective resonates deeply within executive coaching, where the coachee is encouraged to prototype new behaviours, experiment, test, and refine their approaches to discover what truly works for them.
As a summary, the mindset of design thinking and the steps are beneficial in the context of executive coaching too. Ultimately, both design thinking and executive coaching equip individuals with the insights and frameworks necessary to tackle multifaceted challenges, whether in a business context or on a personal journey.

About the Author

Sri Krishnan is a leadership coach , innovation catalyst mentoring startups and consulting on Engineering R&D

The next steps in the design thinking (DT) process is the define and ideation stages. Instead of thinking about how to extract work from your team, what if we considered, ‘How can I become an inspiring leader, so that people are eager to work with me?’

The next formal step in Design Thinking (DT) is the “define” stage, where the problem to be solved must be articulated with precision. In the context of executive coaching, what we refer to as “leverage” and “goal” are pivotal components corresponding to this stage. Leverage represents the core issue — the one that, if addressed, would make a significant difference, and provide the greatest return on investment.

I encountered a classic coaching scenario involving a leader named Ravi, who struggled to effectively engage his team and achieve results. The reasons could be multiple, like not able to trust the people and delegate, perfectionism leading to dissatisfaction with the work quality of the people, fear of losing the control, fear of becoming redundant if all the work is done by the team, fear of not being the go-to person, belief that the team is not good, not respecting the team members, etc and the list is endless. The data showed clearly the problem is with the leader rather than the team.

During one of our initial coaching sessions, Ravi expressed his frustration, saying, “Sri, how do I extract work from my people? That seems to be my problem.”

His question evoked a vivid image in my mind. I responded, “Ravi, I hope you don’t mind me saying this, but as a coach, I must ask: You sound like a supervisor from ancient Egypt, overseeing the construction of a great pyramid.” Intrigued, Ravi leaned in as I continued, “Imagine a supervisor wielding a whip to drive the slaves who are not interested in the work.” Ravi looked horrified.

I explained, “Unfortunately, the way you’re framing the question—‘extracting work’—leads me to envision this scenario.” The realization struck him, and he fell silent.

We had previously seen how rephrasing questions can yield vastly different solutions. For example, “How can we reduce waiting time at the airport?” versus “How can we make the airport waiting experience enjoyable?” each lead to distinct paths of inquiry.

I then posed a transformative question to Ravi: “Instead of thinking about how to extract work from your team, what if we considered, ‘How can I become an inspiring leader, so that people are eager to work with me?’” This shift in perspective became the coaching goal, guiding Ravi to view his challenge through a completely new lens.

The next step in the design thinking (DT) process is ideation, and I encouraged Ravi to brainstorm ways to become an inspiring leader. Ideation is inherently a creative endeavour, and as a coach, I serve as a catalyst to help bring out that. While Ravi possessed a strong sense of creativity—one of his top strengths—he often channelled it primarily into managing the extensive workload he had assumed.

Instead, I prompted him to harness that creativity to generate innovative ideas aimed at achieving his goal of inspiring leadership. Through our discussions, Ravi developed a comprehensive action plan. He started by observing a leader he admired, dissecting the qualities that made this individual inspiring. He explored books and videos focused on effective delegation, enhancing his understanding of how to empower his team. By trying out the ideas as experiments and seeing the results, Ravi could now see the capability of his people, give the big picture rather than tasks, appreciate them give critical feedback as needed.

That leads to the final steps of prototyping and testing in DT and their relevance in coaching.

(To be concluded in Part-V)

About the Author

Sri Krishnan is a leadership coach , innovation catalyst mentoring startups and consulting on Engineering R&D

Is service excellence as a culture really thriving?

Caution: this post is about the cultural dimensions of service excellence. While I have worked in service businesses extensively, I am staying out of offering views on that subject.

My view is that service excellence as a culture is deeply vitiated. I am left wondering if companies offering services want to listen to you, want to be reached, want to talk to you or only want to force you to rate them well and live in a state of hubris.

The era of technology and mobile app enabled service delivery, fueled by social media pressures and a somewhat flawed interpretation of the idea of Net promoter Scores, delivered by helpless frontline employees may be causing this.

Starting with the 1980s, there was a very strong service quality and service excellence movement emanating especially from the United States. We have all heard legendary concepts like Moments of Truth by Jan Carlzon (SAS) and books like Delivering Quality service by A. Parasuraman, Leonard Berry, and Valarie Zeithaml. They spoke about service excellence and a passion for delivering great customer service.

An entire generation of business and HR leaders (me included) were inspired to build a culture of customer centricity and service excellence using these ideas.
Such a culture meant leaders listening to customers and welcoming feedback, managers designing processes to deliver quality service and front-line employees trained to implement these processes with competence and courtesy.

What is the situation today?

Be it buying a car or a service, calling a Bank or an Airline, or reaching a call centre of any large product or service business (that is if you manage to reach a human being), the frontline sales or service person you deal with appears mostly preoccupied with obtaining (extracting) from you a rating of 9 or 10 on a 10-point scale.

I wonder if it is the confluence of social media, technology and incentives that is pushing everything down to the poor frontline employee and completely destroying the genuine intent of listening to customers. What is the culture that would perpetrate such a behaviour I wonder. Do you want to listen and learn or look good?

I even wonder if business leaders are giving the message to their front-line employees and customers that they just want to look good and don’t want to listen to customers.

If you really want to listen to customers, you must be accessible, be curious and humble. Not push someone to say that they are a “Net promoter”.

I genuinely believe something is seriously broken about our current approach to service excellence and customer centricity as a culture and the sooner we fix it, the greater the chances of not alienating your employees, leave alone your customers.

Youtube Link: https://youtu.be/hrFfosiBexY

“What are the distinct questions that need to be ascertained about the Coachees? How do Coaches ensure that their expectations about the Coachee’s approach and willingness to change are in line with the Coachee’s own ideas and expectations?”

In my multiple coaching assignments over the last decade and beyond, I have gone through unique experiences with respect to the ‘state of the Coachee mindset’. I have had to calibrate and recalibrate myself many a time as my expectations about the Coachee’s approach and willingness to change were simply not in line with the Coachee’s.

Let me give you 3 examples to illustrate the above…

1. I was called in by a client to discuss a potential coaching requirement. He was keen to have his Operations Head go through developmental coaching as he held a lot of potential and was a very successful all along.
After the 3-way sponsor meeting, I had a ‘get the chemistry going ‘ meeting with the Coachee. The Coachee candidly said to me that he was wondering why he needs coaching and was actually a bit upset on being pushed through this initiative. He was at a loss to rationalize the need to be coached.

2.Here was a ‘Top talent’ rising star of a corporate organization who was sponsored for Coaching. The sponsor was the CXO who had taken enormous interest to help and support the Coachee’s development journey. The usual process of coaching starting with the three way meeting, followed by the Chemistry meeting both which went very well…The Coachee’s enthusiasm for the ‘journey ahead’ was visibly evident.
But then during our 360 degree feedback session, wherein I had to flag a key feedback on his brashness with other functional colleagues, I encountered an unexpected insight into the Coachee’s thought process. The Coachee’s point was “I am a top talent, do I really need to change?”
It was then, that the Coachee’s first resistance to change came to the fore. We had to go through an extra session to make the Coachee understand how brashness and scant regard for others, has the potential to be a ‘fatal flaw’ in his personality. This could well be the Achilles heel that could completely derail the Coachee’s career growth.

3. This is the example of a Coachee being groomed to take over as the MD of the Company.
I must say that he was proving to be a Coach’s delight for the following reasons…..

The sponsor had clearly communicated to the Coachee that the agenda was one of ‘grooming and succession development’. The Coachee was exhibiting clear discipline session after session on the actioning, journaling and reporting. A mid-course review meeting went on a positive note with the Sponsor being happy with the positive changes involving new behavioral practices of the Coachee. In this particular case, the Coachee was demonstrating an inclusive approach in his meetings, was patient to listen etal.

At the closure meeting of the Coaching journey…the question was ‘how would the Coachee sustain his inclusive approach going forward?’ We had listed having a peer as an
Accountability partner with periodic meetings to share the experiences around the new
behaviors(habits).This was part of the Sustainability plan.

Before even a month after the closure I got a call from the sponsor saying that he was noticing the Coachee regressing into his old behavior patterns.

In all the above cases there are distinct phases when the ‘penny drops’…as in, the Coachees throws up their hands and are at odds with the initiative, in part or in full.

For a Coach, the success comes from seeing a sustainable change in the behavior of the Coachee even after the Coaching journey is closed.

So what are the distinct questions that need to be ascertained about the Coachees? Let us understand them.

1. Are you ready for change?

2. Are you ready to make the change?

3. Are you prepared to make the change a life-long habit?

While there cannot be any guarantees for the above, it is more like a ‘psychological contract’ that the Coachee needs to sign up for her(him)self.

It would be in order if the Coach brings up a discussion around these questions right at the beginning of the Coaching process….the Coaching journey then becomes ’intentional’!

Author – P. Senthil Kumar CFI Coach

About the Author

Senthil is a EQi 2.0 Practitioner and is passionate about the application of Emotional intelligence in Coaching. He is a seasoned HR leader with over nearly 30 experience in diverse sectors such as FMCG, Oil and Gas, Hospitality and Metals and Minerals.

“Both DT and coaching fundamentally embrace a humanistic approach, deeply rooted in empathy. The true power of innovation lies not just in creative design, but in the genuine empathy it comes with. ”

There are formal steps and stages in Design Thinking (DT). The first step is empathize.

Both DT and coaching fundamentally embrace a humanistic approach, deeply rooted in empathy. A prime example of this can be seen in the story of Airbnb. The founders, struggling to afford their rent in San Francisco, came up with the brilliant idea to help people in similar financial straits. Recognizing that many attendees at local conferences could not afford exorbitant hotel prices, they asked themselves: why not create a bed-and-breakfast experience using the vacant space in their own apartment? This empathetic insight not only solved their problem but also transformed the hospitality industry.

Another moving illustration is the story of Doug and his innovation. Doug Dietz, the visionary designer behind multimillion-dollar magnetic resonance imaging (MRI) systems at GE—an extraordinary machine that enables doctors to peer inside the human body was proud of his engineering feat. However, his perspective shifted dramatically during a visit to a hospital, where he witnessed firsthand how his creation affected its young patients. As he observed a frail girl clutching her parents’ hands, tears streaming down her cheeks while they urged her to summon her courage, he experienced a profound revelation. In that moment, Dietz realized that while he had successfully crafted a technological marvel, he had overlooked the emotions of the people who would use it.

Many of us can relate to the unsettling experience of being inside an MRI machine or watching a loved one being pushed into the intimidating tunnel. We often share a common dread—the anxiety of enduring the machine’s jarring noises and the tightening knot in the stomach about the impending test results. Dietz’s encounter serves as a powerful reminder that true innovation must also consider the emotional impact of technology on its users, urging us to foster compassion and empathy in all our creations.

Doug’s deep empathy for the patients transformed his approach to design. The result was an immersive experience for children that rivalled the thrill of an amusement park. What was once a horrifying ordeal morphed into a delightful adventure. A fanciful pirate ship theme captivated one little girl so much that she turned to her mother, beaming with excitement, and asked if she could come back to “play” again! This profound shift highlights that the true power of innovation lies not just in creative design, but in the genuine empathy that Doug embodied throughout the process. In one of the most-watched TED Talks, Doug narrates this poignant story, his voice choking with emotion. It becomes clear that the heart of this project was not advanced technology, but rather the compassion and understanding that sparked this transformation.

As a coach, I frequently encounter similar scenarios. During one notable coaching engagement, the organization had provided a 360-degree feedback report in advance, aiming to aid coaches to maximize productivity from the very first meeting. They had also pinpointed specific focus areas—such as strategic mindset and risk-taking—that aligned with the company’s aspirations. As a novice coach at the time, I arrived thoroughly prepared, armed with a comprehensive profile analysis, a summary of the 360-degree feedback, and the improvement areas identified by the manager. With all the necessary data points at my disposal and a few initial hypotheses in mind, I felt confident to identify the root causes much like Sherlock Holmes.

However, upon entering the room to meet my coachee, Vibha, I sensed that something was amiss. She sat before me, her eyes wet with tears as she struggled to compose herself. The 360-degree feedback report was open in front of her.

After a brief introduction, I gently inquired, “Are you alright? How can I help you?” She broke down, “I did not want to get coached but my manager forced me to attend.” That is when my empathic instinct took over. My Sherlock Holmes garb had vanished in a second.

I quickly reassured Vibha, explaining that coaching cannot be forced without her consent and commitment. I even offered to take her concerns to management and HR. This seemed to bring her some comfort, and she gradually began to share her story. She was grappling with significant health challenges and caring for a young child. She had intended to take a year-long sabbatical; however, her husband had lost his job, thrusting her into the role of breadwinner. The pressure weighed heavily on her, making it difficult to concentrate on work. The 360-degree feedback report had become the final straw. It contained numerous critical comments about her inability to strategize, missed deadlines, and unavailability for important meetings. “That is not me!” she cried, visibly shaking.

I took the feedback document and tossed it aside.

“Vibha, let us forget about that document for now. I can only imagine how horrific it must feel to walk into a coaching session, interpret feedback and talk about strategic thinking, result focus, risk-taking etc. “ I could see a weak smile from Vibha.

“I know how you feel, my sister went through a similar ordeal in the middle of her career.”

Vibha was talking about her health, and how the doctor had told her to get into a diet plan and exercise regime, otherwise her diabetes was going to get worse. Her young son wanted to be with her all the time demanding attention. Her husband had become withdrawn. The first hour went on like this. There was no point in following the formal steps of coaching.

After some time, Vibha had come out of the shock, anger, and desperate feeling that the 360 feedback had imparted. She said let us talk about my professional things. I knew that all the people identified for coaching from the company were high potentials and future stars. I asked Vibha tentatively, “Do you want to talk about your past achievements, the achievements that you are proud of? The things that made you feel that you were special, the moments that you cherish, the success stories that you often share? “ As she talked, Vibha was transforming, her slouched posture had gone, her voice was without quiver, her tone became positive and she did not want to stop. I knew that the coaching had started. Though I was just listening, I knew Vibha was answering many questions for herself.

I realized the power of empathy and it was a lesson for me as a coach. That is the first step of DT as well to empathize before anything else. And that is a powerful tool to tackle the complex problems.

(To be continued in Part-IV)

Author – Sri Krishnan, CFI Coach

About the Author

Sri Krishnan is a leadership coach , innovation catalyst mentoring startups and consulting on Engineering R&D

“Coaches, much like design thinkers, seek to uncover the right questions—those that prompt the Coachee to reflect, introspect, and gain insights that pave the way for a brighter future. By actively listening to the Coachee’s experiences and emotions, coaches ask insightful questions with empathy. ”

Design Thinking (DT) fundamentally differs from Traditional Thinking (TT) in several key aspects. While TT emphasizes the pursuit of the “right answer,” DT focuses on uncovering the “right question.” The underlying philosophy of DT is that the most effective solutions will naturally emerge when we prioritize the right inquiries.

Consider our frustrating experiences of waiting at airports. A TT approach to this issue might pose the question, “How can we reduce waiting times?” This inquiry typically leads to solutions centered around logistical constraints—such as space, staffing, automation, bottlenecks, response times, and existing processes. Such a mindset often results in endless cycles of efficiency improvement programs that may optimize operations but fail to enhance the overall experience for travellers. Conversely, the DT perspective encourages a more positive inquiry: “How can we transform airport waiting into a pleasurable experience?” This approach opens the possibility for innovation, driving the creation of airport environments like in Singapore, where travellers actively enjoy their time rather than merely endure it. While TT tends to rely heavily on quantitative data and rigorous analysis, DT emphasizes the importance of qualitative experiences and emotions that resonate with people.

Coaches, much like design thinkers, seek to uncover the right questions—those that prompt the Coachee to reflect, introspect, and gain insights that pave the way for a brighter future. By actively listening to the Coachee’s experiences and emotions, coaches ask insightful questions with empathy.

Another essential element of Design Thinking is the adoption of a beginner’s mindset. This mindset invites us to explore possibilities without making assumptions. It is often said that “in the beginner’s mind, there are many possibilities; in the expert’s mind, there are few.” This principle is crucial in coaching, as it encourages a process of exploration rooted in empathy, free from judgment and preconceived notions.

I recall the briefing from a sponsor about a potential Coachee, Ranjit.

The sponsor began with high praise: “Ranjit is a great guy; With his deep knowledge he’s an invaluable asset to our technology team.”

I was wondering Wow, that sounds like an ideal techie to have in the team. I was waiting for the inevitable ‘but’. The sponsor came there soon. He explained, “Everything I mentioned is true—when Ranjit chooses to take on a challenge. However, lately, he has been hesitant to embrace new opportunities. Despite his extensive expertise, he lacks initiative and rarely steps up unless he is pushed hard. This has led to frustration among his colleagues, who are now seeking someone who can take the lead.”

It is all too easy for a coach to jump to conclusions about Ranjit’s situation, assuming he must be lazy or complacent. However, human behaviour is far too intricate to be captured in such a linear fashion; doing so is a naive perspective. We are confronted with complex challenges involving a multitude of interdependent factors. For instance, Ranjit may be grappling with a deep-seated fear of failure, facing personal struggles such as a family member dealing with a serious health issue, enduring a toxic relationship with a supervisor, feeling undervalued in his contributions, or perhaps experiencing a sudden existential crisis regarding the purpose and meaning of his work and life. The possibilities are virtually endless.

As coaches, we must adopt a mindset like that of a design thinker—one that embraces curiosity and openness, much like a beginner. This awareness is merely the starting point. In our previous discussions, we explored the essential mindsets needed for both design thinking and coaching. As we move forward, let us delve into the formal design thinking steps—Empathize, Define, Ideate, Prototype, and Test—and examine how these can be applied in coaching to effectively engage with the complexities of human behaviour.

(To be continued in Part-III)

Author – Sri Krishnan, CFI Coach

About the Author

Sri Krishnan is a leadership coach , innovation catalyst mentoring startups and consulting on Engineering R&D

“Traditional linear and systematic problem-solving methods often fall short in addressing the complexities we face. Among the various present day frameworks available, design thinking has emerged as a particularly powerful tool. Design thinking is an innovative methodology founded on human-centric design, prioritizing empathy over mere logic.”

We are living in transformative times—an optimistic perspective for those willing to embrace change. However, the reality is far more complex than it seems. The pace of change is sweeping through like a tsunami wave. The pandemic, for instance, ignited a global fear for the survival of humanity itself. Current geopolitical tensions reveal that we are yet to learn the lessons history has to offer. Economic cycles have become increasingly erratic, while disruptive technologies, such as artificial intelligence, are revolutionizing every sector. These factors, among others, contribute to the chaos enveloping us.

In today’s rapidly evolving landscape, the qualities essential for leadership are fundamentally different from the command-and-control models that emerged during the Industrial Revolution. Leaders now encounter unscripted challenges that lack textbook solutions, case studies, or predetermined recipes for success. The obstacles they face are not solely external; leaders must also confront their own self-limiting beliefs, gremlins and the myriad complex behavioural patterns that can impede their effectiveness. It is not just organizations that grapple with existential threats; individual leaders, too, find themselves navigating precarious waters where their very capacity to lead is tested.

The solutions required in today’s business landscape are markedly different from those of the past. Traditional linear and systematic problem-solving methods often fall short in addressing the complexities we face. Addressing these multifaceted challenges necessitates a collaborative approach that delves deeply into understanding the needs, motivations, and behaviours of individuals. Among the various frameworks available, design thinking has emerged as a particularly powerful tool. Design thinking is an innovative methodology founded on human-centric design, prioritizing empathy over mere logic.

Numerous remarkable examples illustrate the power of design thinking: the Apple iPhone, which redefined the mobile phone experience; Airbnb, which revolutionized the concept of accommodation; and Netflix, which transformed home entertainment. Each of these innovations was inspired by the principles of design thinking. Design thinking can be described as a human-centered approach to innovation that emphasizes empathy and creativity to address challenges, uncover new opportunities, and enhance lives. This description is equally relevant to executive coaching, which serves as a humanistic approach to leadership development. Executive coaching empowers leaders to tackle challenges in their current roles, equips them to seize future opportunities, and ultimately enriches their lives beyond the professional sphere.

Coaching transcends the confines of traditional textbook solutions, recognizing that everyone is unique. This uniqueness not only enriches the coaching process but also creates a more personalized and effective journey for growth and development. As I embarked on my formal studies in executive coaching and began to apply what I learned in practice, I was immediately struck by the compelling parallels between design thinking (DT) and the coaching process, particularly in addressing complex, unscripted problems.

To illustrate this connection, let us first examine the foundational mindsets and philosophies of design thinking. We can then explore the formal steps of the design thinking process and explore how these principles can be effectively applied within the coaching framework.

(To be continued in Part-II)

Author – Sri Krishnan, CFI Coach

About the Author

Sri Krishnan is a leadership coach , innovation catalyst mentoring startups and consulting on Engineering R&D

“How does cultivating relationships enable these leaders to become Resilient?
Is it a natural ingrained mental and moral toughness or can it be consciously cultivated?
One standout ability has been to consistently build strong, trusted relationships with peers and colleagues, customers and business partners, ecosystem players, and others.”

In my long career and even in my shorter Coaching career, I have seen leaders who confronted challenges, sought and accepted the more difficult assignments over the more glamorous, come out stronger and carve out a new image and credibility for themselves and their teams.
They have used the opportunity of a crisis, treaded the difficult path laden with minefields that could blow up in their faces (or careers), demonstrated courage and led their teams with conviction that so often have seen their careers (as along with their team’s) flourish to a new trajectory – pathways opening up
to new projects, new initiatives and programs, and of course, bigger and much tougher roles and assignments too!
This individual strength and competence is the much needed Resilience attribute – required ever so much in Leaders.

It’s most often their specific abilities in inspiring and motivating their teams, ‘sense-making’ of challenging times and bringing together, the ‘dynamic capability’ to garner resources, envision a more positive future and make happen the ‘new’ with
confidence and purpose. Their strengths in combining realism with optimism, and ease in demonstrating agility and flexibility keep not just them but their teams continuously motivated.

But how do they actually do it? How does cultivating relationships enable these leaders to become Resilient?
Is it a natural ingrained mental and moral toughness or can it be consciously cultivated?
One standout ability has been to consistently build strong, trusted relationships with peers and colleagues, customers and business partners, ecosystem players, and others.

This has shown to be pivotal for Executive Leaders navigating through difficult times and
tough business challenges. These relationships serve as a foundation of support, collaboration, and shared vision that can drive teams and organizations forward. However, it must be noted that these relationships must not be cultivated as pure ‘business transactional networks’ but be a genuine
foundation of the leadership style and ethos.

This ability is one that can be consciously developed, though with empathy and genuine interest.
Ultimately, the strength of these relationships lies in mutual trust and commitment. When leaders cultivate such bonds, they create resilient networks and person to person, human connections that can withstand pressures and enable the leaders and their teams to emerge stronger from crises. This interconnected web of support enables
leaders to navigate uncertainties with agility and confidence, ensuring their teams and organizations not only survive but thrive in the face of adversity.

What does this network really provide?
Firstly, peers and colleagues provide a network of internal support. Leaders can lean on them for advice, perspective, and shared experiences. This network can amplify problem-solving capabilities through diverse viewpoints and collective wisdom, creating a more robust approach to tackling challenges. Countless examples emerged in my studies on how during Covid, employees willingly
shared responsibilities cutting across roles and silos. In multiple Finance companies, Sales folks shifted to Collections and Customer Support to keep the business ‘lights-on’.
In new-age food-tech businesses,
when food delivery was perceived as hazardous to health, the organization and willing staff, managers and leaders rapidly re-pivoted to newer lines of business such as grocery delivery, satisfying a critical
need of the day. This enabled the companies to rebuild processes, technologies and even new relationships in the market with speed and urgency. The commendable confidence and ‘leadership from the front’ displayed by the senior leaders inspired trust in their teams, that their interests will be taken care of. This spurred the staff on to new energy, diligence and activity, strengthening the bonds evermore.
In another instance, when the Business
Leader transparently talked about the business challenges and sought suggestions at this time of common difficulty, the staff in an unprecedented gesture voluntarily came up with a suggestion to pool in 50% of the personal leave to a common pool to be utilized for the welfare of their colleagues in medical need.
Building relationships does open up new answers from surprising areas.

The importance of transparency
Engaging customers and business partners with openness and honesty fosters trust and loyalty. When leaders communicate transparently, they build a sense of partnership and mutual respect. This cultural
shift ensures that customers and partners are more likely to stand by the organization during tough times, offering their support and continued business. The Covid period once again provided wonderful
examples of this. A software company CEO mentioned how a long standing bank customer in Europe, known for their rigor and tough negotiations, willingly understood and agreed to standby them during
the difficult times – approvals for changed process and security clearances happened in double quick time, services contracts were extended for longer durations with handy price increases and the inevitable project delays were condoned in a welcoming spirit of partnership and shared trust and
camaraderie that had been nurtured over 15-years.

A solar-energy engineering company similarly
mentioned that based on a tough, prior project executed for a key industrial customer, a new contract was won by them during this period, in a relatively newer area, based on trust and absolute transparency and equation they had built with the business leaders.

Building collaborations
Collaborations with other players in the ecosystem, extend a leader’s reach and resources. These external relationships can bring new opportunities, insights, and innovations into the organization. By
maintaining a strong network within the ecosystem, leaders can quickly adapt to changes, leverage external expertise, and implement best practices from across industries. Multiple business leaders also
mentioned their stories on how their banks and lenders backed them to the hilt, extending their facilities and paybacks, approving newer arrangements during tough times etc all because of the relationships built over decades.
Stories about how even industrial competitors collaborated to support each other, while also servicing the common customer abounded. Again, all these stories emerged from the relationships, trust and reputation built by leaders across the two companies.

So, while resilience building for an organization may call for capital buffers, scarce inventory stockpiles, redundant technology resources, manufacturing capacity etc, for Leadership Resilience, clearly a key
force multiplier is the Leader’s Relationship strengths.

Author: Dr. Raj Swaminathan, CFI Coach

About the Author

Dr. Raj Swaminathan is an experienced IT Business Leader, CEO & Board Member of a listed company for 10+ years, having led and grown a strong BFSI Product Business with key Global Clients across 50+ countries. He considers his strongest strengths to be building teams, grooming talent (Technical, business & Leadership) and fostering an environment of inclusiveness, camaraderie and meritocracy.

“There is glamour attached to Talent while Hard work and Learning seems mundane. Also not being born with a certain talent is an excellent excuse to hide our inabilities. But the fact is human potential and capacity is enormous.”

My coachee posed this question to me – Are leaders made or born?

A Coach’s answer to this question will be – What do you think?

A consultant’s answer to this question will be – It depends

A most probable answer from a leader to this question will be – Born.

Most of us like to think that leadership is a trait one has to be born with and there is very little, if at all, that can be taught. There is glamour attached to Talent while Hard work and Learning seem mundane. Also not being born with a certain talent is an excellent excuse to hide our inabilities. But the fact is human potential and capacity is enormous.

Before Jim Hines ran 100 meters in 9.95 seconds in 1968, breaching the 10 second mark seemed unattainable for the human body. But once it was done, many others repeated the feat in the past 6 decades.
David Goggins, the US Navy Marine and author of the best-selling book “Can’t Hurt Me” was obese weighing over 300 pounds, who could not run even half a mile before he started training for the Marines and today, has hundreds of ultramarathons to his name.

In 1972 a Uruguayan plane crashed in the remote area of the Andes Mountain range. Two young men, Roberto and Nando, trekked the snow mountains without equipment or warm clothing, in the harshest conditions to a village on the other side of the range, in the Chilean foothills and were able to rescue 14 passengers who were stranded for 72 days. Robert’s quote “Don’t wait for the plane to crash to realise how much you have” says it all.

These three inspiring stories, and there are many more, are a testimony of what can be achieved with a strong, unbreakable resolve and untiring, consistent efforts. Leadership can be no different. It can be learnt. One can become far better at leading by working on the self, making the most of our strengths and acquiring new competencies.

As I heard my coachee emphasise about what in his view was the role of talent, I gave him an example of Ravi Shastri, one of the most successful cricketers across various facets of the game i.e. as a player, a commentator and Indian Team Coach. As a player he had quite a few limitations, both as a batsman and bowler, but he always made the most of his abilities and succeeded as an all-rounder despite his limitations.

I shared my view with him that, the mistake we make is to typecast a leader as someone bestowed with a superpower that she/he can be – visionary, charismatic, orator, well-read, detail oriented, commercially astute, well-networked, a consensus builder, an organisational builder, technologically advanced, well- travelled, and so on. But the fact is one doesn’t need all of this to be a leader. A leader needs to be great at some of these but develop the ability to inspire others into being great in the other areas. To be able to not just tap into one’s own abilities but into the capabilities of the team makes a leader. The three foundational aspects for anyone to be an effective leader over the long term are:

1. Have the Will to lead – You cannot be a good leader if you do not have the will. Leadership is a responsibility and comes with certain sacrifices, only when you have the will to make those choices, can you become the journey to the Leadership.
2. Acquire a Growth Mindset – Leadership is about continuous learning, unlearning and relearning. It is also putting your learning into action. Understanding the existing constraints but determinedly going forward, without overthinking those constraints, can achieve just as much as brilliance can, just as the 3 examples above demonstrate.
3. Inspire trust – In today’s complex world, the Complete Man (or Woman) is a myth and no one expects one person to be a ‘be-all’. As Steve Jobs said “Great things in business are never done by one person. They’re done by a team”. To be a great leader over time, you have to inspire trust…trust in your teams, in your business partners, in your customers and in the society. That takes committing to action and maneuvering tough situations to achieve it.

What is your opinion – Are leaders made or born?

Author: Sachin Paranjape, CFI Coach

About the Author

Sachin Paranjape is a strategic thinker and has vast experience in working with multiple clients, across several sectors, on risk management, internal controls, and governance. His forte is building teams, nurturing talent, and developing people networks.

It’s ironic that much of what we learn—technological skills, communication techniques, and customer-first mindsets— often falls short in the face of emotional challenges. As leaders, we must confront our own anxieties and encourage our teams to do the same.

Reflecting on my three-decade IT corporate journey, I realize that embracing the “Leader as a Coach” philosophy could have significantly enhanced my effectiveness as a leader. In my coaching practice, I often share my experiences with fellow leaders, including my coachees, to encourage them to adopt these insights when needed. Through these discussions, I’ve gained valuable perspectives that I now incorporate into my coaching. One crucial aspect I want to emphasize is the importance of empathy and fostering resilience in leadership.

Over the past 18 to 24 months, many large IT multinationals have faced significant downsizing, creating a climate characterized by Volatility, Uncertainty and Anxiety across the organisation. Today’s corporate landscape has become increasingly complex and nothing like what I have experienced a couple of decades ago. The reasons can be any of – Investor expectations, silent layoffs being labelled differently, over hiring post pandemic to meet the business pressures, trying to meet customer expectations due to market pressure.

Interestingly, we can argue that it is becoming increasingly incomprehensible as the same organisation(s) are hiring on one hand while on the other hand layoffs are being executed. This could be due to shifting business strategies and companies trying to constantly evolve and pivoting to adopt or enhance their technology portfolio around Cybersecurity, Generative AI, Cloud, 5G etc.

A question never answered is – if every company is upskilling their employees and running a tight ship, why does this situation arise? However, these factors contribute to the complexity and ambiguity surrounding layoffs in the IT industry and it creates uncertainty, fear and anxiety among employees. This is suggesting that traditional values, which were once supposed to be company cultural values, are slowly eroding. Hence, it is all the more relevant to discuss Empathy and Resilience now, so that the focus remains on people and their emotions.

Leaders must be empathetic first.
As a leader, I always practiced and preached, our actions speak louder than our words. Demonstrating empathy through our actions builds real trust and loyalty, reducing anxiety and helping employees focus on constructive efforts rather than panic or resist change. Empathy acts as a catalyst providing the emotional support employees need during challenging periods. When employees feel safe to voice ideas and concerns without fear of judgment, experimentation and creativity will automatically follow.

In my early managerial days, my approach involved relaying messages from senior leadership to my team, urging them to innovate and adapt during times of change. I often reassured them about the stability of our function compared to other departments. However, experience taught me that during turbulent times, it’s challenging for individuals to concentrate on their tasks, let alone be innovative.

I shifted my strategy to asking open-ended questions: What do you need to navigate this situation? How can I support you? What actions can we take if things don’t go as planned? How are you feeling at work? Recognizing that we face these challenges together is essential for fostering teamwork and resilience.

It’s ironic that much of what we learn—technological skills, communication techniques, and customer-first mindsets— often falls short in the face of emotional challenges. As leaders, we must confront our own anxieties and encourage our teams to do the same. The cultural pressures associated with job loss can be overwhelming, and as future leaders, we must cultivate courage and openness to face such adversities. Developing resilience involves taking responsibility for our careers and stepping out of our comfort zones. This journey requires self-learning, embracing new technologies, and maintaining a growth mindset to effectively navigate the Volatile, Uncertain, Complex and Ambiguous and landscape. Now, more than ever, the demand for “Coaching Leaders” is crucial to drive impactful change.

I recall coaching a senior leader during a particularly challenging time. His organization was downsizing, and many stakeholders from his initial 360 feedback had changed. With the coaching contract nearing its end, there was pressure from his manager to conclude the engagement due to budget constraints. Understanding my client’s emotional state, I chose to extend our coaching for an additional four months without charge. This act of empathy not only relieved him but also reinforced the importance of emotional awareness in leadership. A good manager, like an effective coach, must be attuned to emotional cues and body language.

In light of these experiences, I encourage leaders to foster environments where empathy and resilience are paramount. As we prepare for uncertain times, it’s vital to support one another and share stories that can help cultivate better leaders for tomorrow. “The era calls for ‘Coaching Leaders’ like never before, as they are pivotal in fostering true transformation in trying times.”

For further insight into navigating these challenges, I recommend reading articles that touch upon the the volatality and uncertainty that seems to be a constant in today’s corporate environment.

I welcome your thoughts and stories on this topic, as we work together to shape the future of leadership.

Author: Kasturi Venkatesh, CFI Coach

About the Author

Mr. Kasturi comes with a rich and eclectic background spanning multiple functions in the IT environment, across large organizations in India and abroad. As head of large global firms, he has spearheaded transformational initiatives which led to business growth. He is respected in the industry as a transformative leader, coach, mentor and thought leader.

Organisations seem to expect two things from its employees across levels:
1. Conformance
2. Drive to achieve

My question is this: can these two coexist?

Let me say some more about both these seeming polarities.

Conformance

Organisations have rules that must be adhered to, processes that must be conformed to, performance goals that must be achieved. There are clear consequences for failing.

A culture of conformance certainly serves a purpose. As organisations pursue scale, this culture of conformance assures predictability.

That is unfortunately in a ceteris paribus world.

Drive to achieve

As we talk to more and more organisations, they tell us that they want leaders across levels to be agile, disrupt, challenge status quo, innovate, deal with uncertainty and ambiguity, show flexibility, take ownership, have fire in the belly and so on.

However, there seems to be disappointment that these qualities are not as widely visible as desired.

This especially among large organisations.

Why is this important?

Large Organisations can see that their businesses are being disrupted by smaller organisations that seem to have less conformance and greater drive to achieve.

They are underdogs, hungry to grow, fighting to survive and fiercely competitive.

Given this evolutionary reality, can they co-exist?

What is going on?

Mark Twain (1835 – 1910) said, “If a cat sits on a hot stove, that cat won’t sit on a hot stove again. That cat won’t sit on a cold stove either. That cat just don’t like stoves.”

For several decades, leaders of people have understood the value of the hot stove rule in ensuring discipline, process compliance and performance. Their employees end up not liking stoves.

Employees of smaller organisations on the other hand live with hot stoves all the time.

Can leaders be coached and trained to enhance their drive to achieve?

There is enough evidence to suggest that the drive to achieve can be inculcated and fueled in individuals.

However, I believe that there are two important pre-conditions for this to work:

1. The employees must have a certain amount of intrinsic desire to achieve, do better and excel and the discipline to pursue that desire in a purposeful manner

2. The system around them (the culture of the organisation and style of the senior leaders) should support these efforts.

Of course, not everyone needs to disrupt. Some need to drive change while many others need to keep things going.

In the days to come, more and more organisations and even nations will find that their cheese has been moved. To find new cheese, they will need to look within, reinvent their culture and values in action, so that leaders can do their work and get comfortable with the hot stove.

Youtube Link: https://youtu.be/6iKsrY3tR3s

A strong recommendation to enhance one’s self-awareness and engage in meaningful self-reflection to establish the real intent behind a career pivot.

Gone are the days of picking a job or a career path and sticking to it forever. Career pivots are far more common today than they ever were. I remember one of my earlier jobs where most of the middle and senior management had put in 20 to 35 years in the same organization. Some of the reasons for pivoting gaining importance include we are not adept at navigating an increasingly complex and uncertain environment, the need for instant gratification (especially in the millennials), to get away from the toxic work environment, feeling of burnout, and lack of motivation and creativity. Post-pandemic this trend has become even more pronounced. It is becoming more evident that in order to navigate this VUCA – Volatility, Uncertainty, Complexity and Ambiguity – world, professionals are constantly re-evaluating their current roles and industries and attempting to pivot their careers.

It is important that a career pivot is a planned, purposeful change in career direction. I remember my first career pivot was not planned and an outcome of how much I disliked my first regular job. The driver of pivot was my perception that this job does not value my contributions and I do not like the people I work with. This could have gone south leading to a downward spiral in my career. Also, if we do not invest in planning a timely pivot, we may then increase the chances of making it an even riskier pivot. Of course, we should not pivot as a reaction to a failure. We should learn from that very failure and evolve and move towards our highest potential. Otherwise, we will be moving from one pivot to another without any value addition. Making a planned pivot is critical and requires determination and introspection.

I strongly recommend enhancing one’s self-awareness and engaging in meaningful self-reflection to establish the intent behind a career pivot. Do you have the answer to these questions:

• Are you on the right path to meet your personal and professional goals?
• Is there something you would love to accomplish in this lifetime (big purpose)?
• What could you gain if you risk the security that you have now?
• Are you currently facing limited room for advancement or skill development?
• Have you discovered a passion/meaning which was missing before?

It was 20 years ago that I first considered moving from a full-time job to an entrepreneurial venture. It was a planned pivot – I made the business plan and was clear about the intent behind the pivot. But I lacked the courage and conviction to push through the change due to the fear of failure coupled with apparent lack of adequate skill set. It is imperative to put the mind-blockers in the right perspective and overcome them through strategizing wisely. After not successfully pivoting to entrepreneurship, I successfully worked in a planned way to pivot my role from function head to MD/CEO. I used the following strategies:

• Seeking and working with a Mentor/Coach
• Cultivating self-confidence – keep acquiring new skills & identify transferable skills
• Allowing room for mistakes – make contingency plans
• Building diverse support networks – make exploring a habit
• Embracing a persuasive narrative of past experiences adding value to your new role

Going through the steps enabled me to make my move confidently, and smoothly.

Career Pivoting is not a leap but a series of steps.

• If you know what you want – plan & implement.
• If you know what you do not want, but do not know what you want – experiment and learn. Make a list of your ‘possible selves’ – check attractiveness & feasibility.
• Check your intent, passion, alignment with purpose, values & aspirations.
• Navigate the emotions – overcome sense of guilt, adjust sense of self, let go of self-limiting beliefs.

In conclusion, while career pivoting can be intimidating, it certainly cannot be left to chance. The rewards are plenty but pivoting successfully requires clear intent, improved self-awareness, actions based on newfound wisdom, and ability to adapt while focusing on progress. Learning these skills will stand you in good stead for making your future pivots even more rewarding.

Mukul Sinha – CFI Coach

About the Author

Mukul Sinha focuses on bringing about a change in leadership abilities to manage problems and develop their unused potential. He brings a holistic, humanistic, and coachee- centric approach.

“What happens when people you’re engaging with, employees, employers, team mates and even top management suddenly go silent on you? How do you respond, how do you foresee and stop it happening?”

Echoes of unanswered moments

Two incidents in the recent past spiked my blood pressure and curiosity at the same time. The first one happened while working on a very tight timeline, and a team member decided to do the disappearing act halfway through, after having volunteered for it in the first place. The second time a team member went completely invisible was when we were about to take a crucial decision on a not so complex matter. This delayed the process for over 8 months, without any solid reasons emerging from the involved person. Why this vanishing act? What sets people to do it? How had I missed foreseeing it? These incidents set me thinking on this now you see me now you don’t phenomena and here, I have shared some personal insights on these conjuring acts.

‘Being Absent from Where one should Be’ (AWOB), aka ghosting isn’t just for dating apps anymore. AWOB has many shades at the workplace and creates significant disruptions! It’s becoming increasingly common for employees, colleagues and even leaders at times to suddenly vanish without explanation. Whether it’s a candidate vanishing during the hiring process or an employee going silent on a project or a leader forgetting to communicate while juggling many priorities.

Why do people stop communicating abruptly?

Communication is the cornerstone of any community and it disturbs the community’s dynamics when one or more go incommunicado without any reason. Why does this happen? The most common reasons are, because they’re afraid to express themselves directly, want to avoid an awkward or difficult conversation or not take the responsibility of the particular job. Other reasons are slightly more hidden, they could be because of introversion, shyness, or perfectionism; a lack of connection, engagement and a breakdown of trust with and amongst people. Sometimes the belief that those they’re dealing with cannot handle a no, makes people simply vanish.

The act of going quiet or in hibernation has been around since we were children. What is new though, is the expanded context –

• The demands from the employee of today are multifold and complex – they want environments cued to mental wellbeing, that promote a balanced approach to work, adaptable working models, flexible schedules, life experiences and agility over traditional career progress. A disconnect between personal aspirations and organizational culture can cause an employee to just go silent, ghosting the company.
• We seem to be losing the skills of direct communication, collaboration, connection and engagement that used to come naturally to us humans. This makes it easy for people to just drop out and disappear rather than take effort to iron out issues.
• In the corporate environment, going silent all of a sudden could denote deeper organizational issues. However, there are several steps a leader can take to create an empathetic culture that brings down incidents of ghosting.

What can leaders do to enable a culture of ‘Being Present Where one should Be’ (PWOB)

1. Foster a culture based on mutual Trust: When people feel comfortable expressing concerns, they’re less likely to disengage or disappear. Establishing a culture where open, honest communication is valued and not judged helps build strong inter and intra office engagements. There are other things a leader can do.

• Encourage transparency. Let people know it’s okay to raise red flags or ask for help
• Create safe spaces for sensitive dialogues and conversations
• Make time for informal check-ins, such as a virtual coffee or a casual chat. They can go a long way in keeping connections going.
• Encourage activities that promote trust and camaraderie
• Use collaborative tools effectively to keep people engaged and involved

Once people feel that they’re listened to in fairness, even when voicing dissent, the probability of arbitrarily disappearing tends to drastically lessen.

2. Set Clear Expectations: Sometimes people don’t know what’s expected of them or they vaguely assume it. This is especially true in a hybrid and digitized world. Unclear job expectations and responsibilities create stress and distrust among colleagues driving people to disappear. Setting expectations is so important that leaders must diligently work on them.

• Co-create and clearly outline responsibilities, deadlines and expectations
• Set up regular touch points to track progress and course-correct if necessary. This prevents people from feeling they’re lost in the shuffle.

These steps taken by the leadership help employees bond better with projects, and take direct responsibility, which brings down any sudden disengagement.

3. Lead with Empathy and Accountability: Striking the right balance between empathy and accountability encourages employees to engage more fully, even during tough times. Some leadership behaviors build employee confidence and a feeling of security to open up.

• Be a professional, be upfront, clear and logical in your communication
• Be prompt and timely in your communication – both good and bad news
• Be kind and honest – honesty without kindness is cruelty and kindness without honesty is hypocrisy
• Hold people accountable in a compassionate way. Work with them to understand why they are feeling disengaged and create a path forward
• Build a feedback loop so that employees feel listened to
• Thank people for their work. Foster a culture of appreciation where employees feel valued, and acknowledged for their work

Empathy fosters deeper involvement of the employees with management goals and with their teams. Chances of ghosting are rare when the employee is seen, acknowledged and appreciated.

4. Recognize the Importance of Mental Health Support: When people are overwhelmed and don’t feel they can ask for help or communicate their struggles, they mentally check out. To create an environment that supports mental wellness is imperative.

• Normalize mental health days and encourage employees to take time off when they need it, without fear of judgment
• Train managers to identify signs of mental distress and approach affected employees with care and understanding
• Watch for signs of disengagement, reduced productivity, or emotional fatigue and offer support proactively
• Encourage a balanced workload and prioritize realistic expectations
• Provide resources for mental health and stress management

We forget that ‘avoidance’ is a form of communication. Silence, disappearing, stalling are all genres of communication. In the end, it’s all about connection.

Dialogue, conversation, being present or whatever term you prefer, is the key to unlocking the “middle way.” A dynamic evolving space of dialogue and mutual discovery. A point where things converge and spark something new. An energy that transcends original positions held, almost like a door that opens, but the path forward isn’t rigid or predetermined, but is shaped by the engagement. A process of continual unfolding in the rhythm of the exchange. That is the essence of the “middle way” – an invitation to co-create and explore in unison. The middle way is the better way to stop ghosting in its tracks.

Author, Ruby Thapar, CFI Coach

About the Author

Ruby is a multifunctional coach with multi sector experience. Her empathy as well as deep understanding of key stakeholders enable her to take the role of crisis and reputation manager with aplomb. She continues to work with international companies across the world and with key stakeholders