Legend has it that Maharishi Valmiki was Ratnakara, was a young boy who was found by a hunter who adopted and raised him and under his guidance became an accomplished hunter. Over the years, as Ratnakara had a family, it became difficult for him to make ends meet.

As a result, out of desperation, he took to rob travelers who passed by his area. One day, Sage Narada was passing by the forest where Ratnakara lived. Ratnakara attacked Sage Narada intending to rob him. Unfazed, Sage Narada asked him why he was committing the sin of robbing and Ratnakara replied, “To feed my family.

” To this, Sage Narada said, “Ratnakara, go and ask your family if they will also share the sins you are committing to take care of them.” Ratnakara returned to his family and asked every member if they were willing to share his sins. No one was ready or willing to share the burden of Ratnakara’s sins.

Heartbroken at his family’s response, Ratnakara returned to Sage Narada and asked him the path to salvation. That set the path for Ratnakara to become Maharishi Valmiki. Entrepreneurs of today get spotted and groomed by many around them. Many in the “ecosystem” benefit from his deeds and actions. If their means are good, the benefits are sustained. If the means are somewhat questionable and they face difficulties, they are soon alone, like Ratnakara realized. While there are accelerators, angel investors, venture capitalists and board members, the question in my mind is this.

Is there at least one person who can as dispassionately as Sage Narada, ask the entrepreneurs some hard questions to set them think? While there are many investors or “interested parties”, how many of them are pursuing their own agendas and how many of them genuinely wish to do what is right for the entrepreneur, even if it means asking hard questions and holding a mirror at the right time. 

As I see bright entrepreneurs becoming tainted all of a sudden, I also ask myself this question. Were they always this way or did their contexts lead them, down this path? Did the people around them care enough to be tough minded in their relationship or pursued their own agendas? I really wish every entrepreneur has at least one or two Sage Naradas in their lives so they can pursue their passion but take the right path.

Every once in a while, during my life time, I have witnessed some new technology idea that appears on the earth and threatens to drive into extinction things that we as human being did. Reams and reams are written about it and then after a while we settle down to the reality that it was not as destructively life altering as it was made out to be.

The latest to stir up such a cocktail of emotions – wonderment combined with fear and panic is Chat GPT. We are told that it will change everything, basically.

Firstly, I am not in the technology profession. I am in the profession of helping people. So, I must admit that I find it hard to comprehend the “all pervading impact” that many are claiming this will have on our lives. That is perhaps my ignorance.

I only know one thing, the thing that I value most – the real Chat GTP. Chat with a Go to Person!

I don’t know about others but I must say that my need to make human connection for things transactional and things transformational, things material and things emotional are very high.

At a transactional level, technology might be pushing me in a direction where I am prevented from going to a person and must instead live with an AI chatbot. My learning propensity will help me cope with these inevitabilities. I go to real people to chat and enhance that learning propensity.

At a social and psychological level, I feel blessed because I have had and continue to have several Go to Persons in my life for things that really matter. Experts who guide me with insights and nuances that illuminate me, friends who listen and assure that they have my back without saying a word, family members who are always there when you need them, professional colleagues and team members who are there to help you get things done and the list goes on.

I am happy that I am also a Go to Person for many people I know and don’t know. People who find value in connecting with me and seeking me out.

To have Go to Persons in your life and to be a Go to Person in other’s lives is what makes us human. That is all I care about. The real Chat GTP.

Have you in the recent past felt vulnerable, felt you were not sure, did not have the answers, filled with emotions, felt that google was not good enough and was determined to seek help from a person instead?

When is the last time you called someone and asked for help to deal with a dilemma or challenge or feedback or a difficult relationship or an unhelpful behaviour or a sticky situation or habit?

Let me start with myself. In the last six months, I have met a counselor, had conversations with at least two peer coaches in addition to seeking out the support of my friends on a wide variety of matters that were important to me or troubling me.

And how did all this help me help others?

At the core of my interactions with people from whom I sought help were deep moments of vulnerability, moments of getting in touch with significant parts of myself, moments of realization. Those very moments of deep vulnerability and realization generated the energy in the form of empathy, sharable insights and the motivation to listen, understand and give. The imagery is of striking oil by digging deep.

To be able to get in touch with my own vulnerabilities has almost always strengthened my ability to help others. It is the well spring of energy.

On the other hand, if I were to imagine a world where I see myself as perfect, all sorted out, evolved, the imagery that comes to my mind is of walking on thin ice – looks smooth outside but ever fragile, ever transient, likely to cave in any time, creating feelings of anxiety. And the relationship that emanates from this place is of “I am absolutely fine, and you are the one that needs help.”

I would like to think of this another way – as a coach, I am constantly encouraging my clients and coachees about the benefits of seeking help and see the place of others in their growth and wellbeing. Yet, if that very experience is alien to me, how incongruent does that seem? How credible is my plea likely to be?

In summary,

None of our lives can be described as ceteris paribus. Everything is changing, we, our relationships, the people around us, our priorities, others priorities, our evolution, others evolution and the world at large. So, the place of another person in our efforts to cope with this ever-evolving state cannot be underestimated.

If we are helpers and coaches, seeking help must be a practice we are comfortable with and have been experiencing periodically.

If we are helpers and coaches and we believe and propagate that change and exploration calls for vulnerability, the question to ask is if I can and have been comfortable with my own vulnerabilities.

On the other hand, to believe that one needs to be perfect to help another person is a myth and even an unnecessary burden.

Can we make a list of “the world’s top 50 friends”? or “The world’s best Spouses” or “The Greatest ever Teachers”.

Many are obsessed with lists that proclaim supremacy about everything – the greatest CEO of the century, the greatest thinkers, “The Power list of CFOs”. Obviously, this practice satisfies many needs and is growing in popularity.

But then, a similar attempt to glorify coaches or ascribe success to individuals is scary. Yes, I am talking about the emergence of lists of “best Coaches” and naturally therefore potential coachees who are pushed to believe that such a list is possible and end up asking “can you tell me who are the best coaches?”

In any profession that is based on a trust-based relationship between two people, it is harmful to single out one person as being responsible for the efficacy of that relationship – especially so in a helping relationship because the act of asking for help and making the helping relationship work is what needs to be respected and celebrated.

Coaching is at its very core a helping relationship. If it works, a lot of the credit must go to the one who sought help and trusted the person and process and invested in it. Credit must also go to the relationship and the safe space that was nurtured by the coach and coachee.

To treat it as a position of fame, power and influence which can be measured in terms of ranks and lists or search engine appearances is not only erroneous but also dangerous. Imagine you are a coachee who has now spotted and decided to work with one of the “best coaches.” What would be the expectations you are likely to stack up against this person – expectations about performance, results, about doing the heavy lifting for you? Imagine you are that coach – what are you likely to be pushed to do to retain your “rank” and “image” and make this relationship a success?

What is of course possible is to outline the set of competencies, skills and values that lead to a helping relationship that can create the conditions for positive outcomes for the coachee. A Competent and ethical coach:

1.demonstrates great empathetic presence
2. is respectful, non-directive, non-judgmental, genuine and empathetic
3.has conversational skills which are at a therapeutic level of proficiency
4.has the intellectual clarity and rigour to bring clarity
5.brings a results focus
6.upholds boundaries of ethics
7. is comfortable with private victory

So, if you are a coachee, take your time to look for these qualities in a potential coach and more importantly ask yourself if the relationship holds promise for you.

The world needs more and more helpers with every passing day. Let’s therefore celebrate the relationship and the greatness of the one seeking help rather than glorify the help giver.

Remember, lists and ranks are extremely transient. Passion to help and the pursuit of excellence are lifelong pursuits.

Imagine someone says this to a surgeon:

“Doctor, I ran some diagnostic tests, detected what needs attention. In the interest of efficiency, I just cut open the patient. Kindly complete the surgery and incidentally, I forgot the anesthesia. He might be in some pain.”

Might sound a bit weird, but in my experience as someone who has been helping set up and manage coaching relationships for many years, some of the recent requests for coaching support sound almost like this.

In talent development speak, this is what it translates into: “We have completed the assessments. We have done some quick debrief. We have arrived at the goals and development plans. Give us a set of coaches who will help implement what we already know quite well needs attention.

Unfortunately, that is not how coaching works. Coaching is not training. It is not intended to “fix” a specific “ailment” that you think you know and have already identified.

Coaching is about a helping relationship where two individuals explore and discover and then determine what needs attention and work on it in a way that is empowering and sustaining so the individuals learn how to help themselves. There is respect for the learner’s ability to determine what is important for that person, faith in that person’s ability to act in responsible ways and trust in the ability of the coach to navigate this exploratory journey in a holistic manner using professional know-how and an ethical foundation.

It is my plea that we approach coaching in a much more holistic manner, paying attention to outlining the context and the broad end states in professional development and leaving it to the coach and coachee to navigate from there on. The non-directive and empowering involvement of all stakeholders to support and offer inputs is what will help.

Remember – the process of discovering what needs attention is a process of taking ownership, having a sense of agency and being accountable. In our enthusiasm to be of assistance, lets not take it away. Also remember, when you assess and debrief a leader without a supporting resource at hand, you might be causing pain, like surgery without anesthesia.

An entire generation of senior leaders (including business owners and Promoters) are shocked that the people they thought were their chosen successors (including their children), the ones who were part of their talent plans are not really excited about taking their jobs.

“These individuals are my potential successors. They have it in them to do my job. But I just don’t see that fire, that initiative – that ambition. Why are they not aspiring for my job?” I hear them ask.

Well, I feel like telling them that there is only one very complex and extremely difficult way to find out – ask and then listen intently and not tell them what they should aspire for!

So, while leaders find the time and energy and skills to have such engaging conversations, I would like to hazard a guess about why individuals may not want their bosses jobs.

First, as the next generation of managers and leaders look at the people above them, they don’t always find their lives inspiring enough to follow their footsteps. In fact, having seen their bosses and their lives in close quarters for many years, they are not sure if that is what they want to do. More importantly, if that is not how they want to do it.

Second, they also realise that there is so much uncertainty in the world around them including their manager’s careers and so don’t see the point of aspiring for something in such a setting of ambiguity. Succession does not appear as neat as it is made out to be. In fact, their guess is that even their manager often does not know where and when he or she is going next.

Third, what their managers accepted as “allowable dishonesties of organizational life” they are not sure if they want to accept and live with.

Fourth, for many, they have ambitions for sure but for different things in life which their managers may not even understand and appreciate. And a big element of this ambition could even be to reduce the level of stress that one would want to live with.

Fifth, the new world of work allows for talented individuals to find ways to earn well and also get a life.

Having said all this, a good conversation may help us help employees look at this from an alternate perspective – that to even stay in one’s current role and remain effective and perform to full potential, one needs to learn, acquire new competencies and be open and flexible to change.

So, when conversations are based on such grounded realities, there might be progress.

I saw a recent press announcement about Krish Shankar retiring from Infosys soon.

Krish is my classmate and dear friend and I wish him a wonderful second career – Shanki, the world is waiting for your knowledge and wisdom in whatever you do.

I could not but be struck by the fact that Krish is being succeeded by a non-HR leader who is an Infosys veteran. That certainly raised some curious questions and thoughts in my mind and wanted to share them here:

Why would a company chose a non-HR person to lead HR? Is it anything to do with the industry? Well, I looked around and found that there is no pattern. Many of the large software services companies are led by HR professionals and in some cases by non-HR professionals.

I then asked myself how these companies defined HR? Are the HR leaders doing and end-to-end HR role or is the meaning of HR changing? For example, is Talent acquisition and resource management not part of the job? Do the partners in the geos report to business or the HR Head? There is a lot of context to how HR is defined and how it is played out – no one rule again. Does learning take a different meaning when technical matters are involved?

Is the job being offered to a non-HR person for that person’s overall development or because they prefer a non-HR person to lead the function or are other factors at play? Is there a view that line professionals are able to bring competencies that are critical in that organizational context?

Is it fair to conclude that below the CHRO, there are almost always specialists from HR in the various functional roles like Talent, Rewards, Employee Relations, Leadership Development and so on? What about their aspirations?

Does the culture of the organization have a role to play in these decisions?

More questions than answers right now.

When you enter a meeting, what is your approach or mind-set most often?

Do you go with a clear set of views but open to editing and modifying them based on emerging inputs – like an editable word document?

Or do you go in there with a clear but inflexible and fixed set of views, intending only to sell and not listen or open to change – like a read only PDF?

Ask people close to you, this question about yourself.

Ask yourself how you feel, dealing with someone who has editable views versus someone who is read only?

If you are a Coach, this might be a useful question to ask the leader you are coaching.

In a world full of uncertainties and multitude of possibilities, it may help to be open to new insights, views and opinions, give others the opportunity to add value, for you to state things in a way that you can save face respectfully, retract from a position easily and not get stuck or be seen as stuck.

Of course, I must hasten to add to comfort a few that unending editing is paralyzing. We must pdf at some stage and move on but then virtue as we all know likes between the extremes.

When a coached leader says that the coaching engagement ‘exceeded all expectations and was life altering’ and this is echoed in the Sponsor’s feedback as well, we know that yet another journey has become successful, thanks to the abilities and commitment of our Coach and the process followed.

This time it was Transition Coaching, a segment which forms a large part of executive coaching engagements at CFI. It aims at helping leaders during that critical time in their careers when they have taken on a new role and are grappling with the pressure of having to establish credibility quickly with either new colleagues, new deliverables or usually both.

How can a coach can help smoothen out a transition and make it more focused and less stressful for the leader?  More importantly, how does one do it in a structured and measurable way? At CFI we stress on process. Our coaches take it even higher when they apply their own systems to ensure transparency and success.

Shakthi was a functional head in a plant involved in the metals business and had just been elevated from heading a functional role in one plant to Unit Head of another. He was a Subject Matter Expert (SME) and well respected in the organisation. It was the first time he was moving out of his comfort zone to handle a general management role with P&L responsibility.

Our coach was appraised by the sponsor of very specific business deliverables that Shakthi would need to work towards. The coach balanced it by making the sponsor aware of behavioural goals which would be needed to achieve these business goals. However, more than other coaching agendas, Transition coaching usually involves a flavour of mentoring for business deliverables, as true success happens when behaviours result in achievement of business goals as well.

The goals for the engagement from the Sponsor’s perspective focused on the transition from a functional manager to a leader and included aligning Shakthi’s new team with the Unit Priorities, Shaping the culture, and Managing External Relationships. In addition to this our coach got more information about Shakthi through 360-degree feedback interviews and a psychometric instrument to ensure he had information from different sources that would help him discover patterns of behaviour along with the Shakthi.

The trust that the coach was able to establish helped Shakthi introspect and reflect on his own challenges and fears. The biggest need that emerged was the need for perfection; something that most SMEs strive towards. Being someone who was willing to process the feedback received, Shakthi was easily guided to cut out the noise of his own self-talk and get more focused on his goals.

The coach partnered with him in creating an integrated action plan where the ‘how’ of achieving the goals led to nine behaviors that were regularly tracked on a real time basis by both. These included remaining connected to the peer group, involving relevant people in decision making, delegation, and empowering people while also being mindful of how one navigates emotions. Supporting articles and videos shared helped Shakthi understand and try out new behaviours at work. He would regularly record his experiences in a shared document as part of the tracking mechanism.

A closure 360 feedback on the identified behaviors was taken, that confirmed the change observed in most behaviours was significant or at the very least, moderate.

A significant moment in this engagement was when Shakthi came back to the coach in one of the check-in calls and shared an interesting challenge – he was finding it difficult to reflect and journal! Journalling is one of the most powerful tools for self-reflection. So, our coach helped by creating for him a basic format with a set of inviting statements triggering Shakthi’s reflections. This support seems to have helped because the ability to reflect became so strong that when there was an additional goal that came up in later conversations with the Sponsor, Shakthi volunteered to take the responsibility of working on it, himself.

The coached leader had become independent and capable of overseeing his own growth and development. This sense of responsibility and confidence is what every CFI coach aspires for in each leader they work with.

Note: This client story is representative of only the essence of the work that happens in each engagement.

Jacinda Ardern, Prime Minister of New Zealand came into the limelight with her compassionate and decisive leadership during the ChristChurch massacre, the Whakaari volcano eruption and the initial handling of the pandemic. She is in the news this time, due to the unexpected timing and novel reason for stepping down from her position.

BBC came under fire for their sexist headline – “Jacinda Ardern resignation: Can women really have it all?” They have since had to apologise. Considering that this was the reaction of a world-renowned global news agency, could this development impact how women in leadership positions are perceived?

As part of our research in this area, we asked women leaders who had reached executive levels/leading divisions and functions an important question – ‘What next’? Interestingly, their answers showed us that after reaching a certain level, most women leaders seem interested in doing something that they consider more meaningful with their lives. The power of an executive role, the pride of position, high earnings and visibility associated with their corporate jobs seem to be subject to the law of diminishing returns.

While some of the women leaders we spoke to were clear that they were looking at forging ahead, many believed that getting into an even higher position comes with a different bag of challenges. They were unsure whether it was worth taking up these positions where power and politics take on a far more pivotal role; where time is more of a premium and pressure becomes a constant. Some were clear they did not have to prove anything to anyone. Women leaders we spoke to were considering giving up positions and compromising their income to take up what makes them feel more fulfilled. Some planned to create and lead their own enterprises. Some wanted to become authors. Some wanted to get into social work and give back to society while others spoke of getting into teaching as their way of giving back.

A lot has been written about whether Jacinda Ardern’s resignation is a sign that women cannot have it all. However, is it not possible that she is having it all? One of the most successful prime ministers, her name has been permanently etched in the annals of her country’s history. She has now decided it is time for something different. She announces her change with integrity. It makes one wonder whether ‘success’ has been defined in far too restricted a manner.

Could the lesson be that like her, all women should have the courage to take a call and do what is right by them?  It could be negotiating for higher pay or stepping up and asking for a particular role. It could be to decide that work is what makes one feel fulfilled. It could be that family comes first.  Each woman, like each man, is dealing with a different set of strengths and realities.

The resignation of Jacinda Ardern – a woman, a partner, a mother and the youngest person to become Prime Minister of her country, reinforces the fact that women have the power to decide what is best for themselves. The power to step up as much as the power to step away.

We don’t need no training programs
We don’t need more pulse surveys
No dark sarcasm around the water cooler
Team, leave your manager aloneHey, employees, leave your manager alone
All in all, they are just another brick in the wall

It is widely believed that one’s relationship with one’s manager is shaped around how one has dealt with authority figures early in their lives – did one submit or rebel or develop a healthy interdependent relationship? This is especially true in the Indian context where the Manager as  coach is still a big deal.

The lucky few have what we call “dream relationships”. Most have working relationships and some unfortunately have dysfunctional relationships.

Leaders and HR functions don’t make it easier for their managers either. Expectations are stacked one upon another unmindful of the fact that in today’s context, managers are also individual contributors with their own work to do. Also, as managerial spans widen and the work that employees do becomes increasingly client facing, complex and remote, work supervision is somewhat of a myth.

So my plea (inspired by Pink Floyd) especially to employees is that they leave their managers alone as far as possible to do some of their own work and not place psychological expectations that may be hard to come by. The sooner one learns to be interdependent and develop a healthy and importantly realistic relationship with their manager, the better it will be for their long careers ahead. It will in fact be liberating. Employees can of course do even better – they can once in a while demonstrate cognitive empathy by trying and seeing what the world looks like from their manager’s vantage point.
Having said that, there are a few things that managers can do.

If you are an employee’s “first boss”, please recognise that it is very special relationship and if handled with sensitivity can have a life long positive impact on the employee and of course not done well can be scarring.

While task management is a thing of the past, the future is about spending the limited time available to contribute to that person’s professional development. Professional development includes not just “teaching” functional and technical stuff. It is about enhancing confidence, enabling success, being a source of support.

Managers need to communicate to the team often enough that they have their own heavy lifting to do, their own individual contributor roles to play and their manager’s expectations to fulfil.

There is one more thing that managers can do – they can learn to demonstrate a style that will help their individual team members and their teams become psychologically self-sufficient early in their journeys so that there is less pressure on the manager to “take care” and more focus on “empowering and developing”.

Good bye team manager, welcome team coach!

It appears that these are hard times for some people in some places. Storied corporations with blemishless brands and their celebrated CEOs who appear on virtually every global “list” are being hauled over the coals for their decisions to layoff more and more employees.

A great brand was among other things supposed to signify “safety”. “Reliability”. That’s why employees for whom “safety” was a career anchor chose big brands. Safety also meant the assurance of a steady pay check and the ability of the organization to absorb the inevitable shocks of the market place.

But then, many did not read the fine print. When you are paid at the 75th percentile or 90th percentile of the global market, the fine print often says “the risk of doing business is shared by you”.

If you are a day one company or are a day one employee, you are both choosing a “market place relationship” .

Things like “long-term orientation”, “seeing you through difficult times” are not part of the value proposition when you sign up for the “75th percentile or 90th percentile and day one job deal”.

While all that I am saying sounds unempathetic (which I normally am not), sad reality is that this is the new deal. The risk of doing business will increasingly be shared by employees as their pay becomes a big part of the cost of doing business.

Do these CEOs suffer their decisions. Perhaps they do. Do they have a choice? Well,, if the “shareholders” are “sway holders”, it may be difficult.

I can say this for sure – if employees work at a place where they have an identity (beyond their identity card) it is perhaps less likely that they will be treated in a manner in which headcount is treated.

So, what deal deal are you signing up for?

My friend Neeraj Sagar has founded a company whose mission statement is to “retire retirement”. I call it “making grey matter”.

What does it take to make one’s second career work?

Observing many in my professional networks and reflecting about my own journey, I have come to recognize a few home truths about making grey matter.

It is their world

If we have worked for 35 – 40 years, it is fair to say that we had our fair share of moments under the sun. If we want to continue doing something of value, it helps to recognize that we are now trying to find a place in their world – the world of the next generation. To feel grateful that we have the privilege to be a part of and contribute in their world really helps.

Your network may have retired too

Many in the professional field flourished, thanks to a wide network of friends, well-wishers, clients and service providers who respected you and even passed a good word around. Chances are, most of them have retired too. As a professional service provider, I often meet decision makers and influencers who may not know me and my past life. They may tell me that they have been in the field for ten years and have done some very complex work. That can be a humbling experience. If we can go past that and engage in a great conversation, it may be an opportunity to build a new network, a new reputation and that could be fun.

What problems are you solving lately?

What I did a decade or two ago is not relevant. The question that will be asked is this – are you solving problems that are current, important and big enough for someone of your stature. If I am, I will be sought after, in demand, valued.
 
The opportunity to be a role model

If we have come this far – worked over three or four decades, maintained our health and have stayed relevant, can solve today’s problems, are self-assured and have the energy to go on, well we are a role model, a source of inspiration for the younger generation. To feel proud without being modest is important.

Selfless independence

I never tire of quoting what Jagdish Sheth and Andrew Sobel refer to as selfless independence in their book Clients for Life. Their list of three dimensions of independence for breakthrough relationships with clients is especially important for grey to matter:

Intellectual Independence: Having the courage to hold differences in perspectives at this stage in life is important.

Emotional Independence: getting over the need to be “liked and approved of” is important in order to ad value.

Financial Independence: Acting in a way that they don’t need that money and will not let money come in the way of one’s values is key.
 
There is a place for us

Interestingly, the next generation is looking for people with wisdom who can listen well and be available to them in their lives provided we can do it in a way that works for them.

The latest Chatbot technology called ChatGPT has users all over the world excited and reasonably impressed. A news article describes it as a ‘software application designed to mimic human-like conversation based on user prompts while harnessing the depths of online knowledge and unfathomable computing power to perform written tasks.’

We had to ask ChatGPT the obvious question and hear it from the horse’s mouth.

Will Artificial Intelligence replace Executive Coaching?

This is what it had to say…

“It is unlikely that AI will completely replace executive coaching in the near future. While AI can assist with certain tasks and provide valuable insights, executive coaching is a highly personalized and interactive process that involves working closely with an individual to help them reach their goals and improve their leadership skills. AI may be able to provide some level of support in this process, but it is unlikely to be able to fully replace the human element of executive coaching. Executive coaching is typically focused on helping individuals develop their interpersonal and communication skills, and these are areas where AI is not yet advanced enough to replace human input. Additionally, the ability to build a rapport and establish trust with the person being coached is crucial for the success of executive coaching, and this is something that AI is not capable of.”

There are a couple of things we would like to add.

1.     Empathy is an important characteristic of the coaching relationship. Inspite of the words being used, it is difficult to believe that AI can actually understand what any of us is going through. Validation and encouragement are another set of important characteristics of a coaching engagement. Most executive coaches work to build the strengths of the leader. When the executive coach is also an experienced been-there-done-that-personality, or even someone who has successfully built the element of trust with the leader, the validation that comes from these individuals is far more powerful than anything AI can hand out!

2.     Executive Coaches, many times, work harder than the leaders themselves to ensure that they are equipping their coachees with all the support needed to meet their goals. The efforts of the coach motivate these leaders to work harder on their own goals.

At the end of the day leaders connect authentically to people who have truly understood or experienced the shedding of sweat, blood and tears that they have.

Coaches struggle, they are not perfect, and it is through those imperfections that they sometimes connect to what the coachee is experiencing. We are sure that there are situations where AI can help. However, AI remains a tool that coaches can use. It cannot be an end in itself; atleast not in the near future like ChatGPT itself says.

What do you think?

Note: Just to complete the AI loop, we hopped over to Dall-E (another new AI system that creates realistic images and even art from a text-based description) and put in ‘‘artificial intelligence cannot replace Best Executive Coaches. ’ The result? The picture you see above. A human taking that photograph would have known something is wrong with the hand, right away!

Hopin, a virtual events start-up (thanks to the pandemic) that raised over a billion dollars in less than a year over 7 rounds of funding and has over 30 investors and reached a valuation of $ 7.8 BN saw its share prices hammered and employees laid off as companies returned to real gatherings.

Zoom, a platform we literally lived in, also lost very significant market cap since 2020. So also did many others in the tech meltdown community.

Does that mean that in 2023, all of us will log out from the virtual world, get real and just turn up in person? That we will value personal connections over appy connections? That we will cherish those moments we have in the presence of others enough to put our devices away? That of course businesses including start ups will get real and build for the long term?

It is my wish that the much demanded “in-person”, “on ground”, “off line” interactions that we are so eagerly embracing also signals a return to several truly wonderful, uplifting, engaging human interactions for all of us, at home and at work, all through 2023!

2023, getting real, in more ways than one!

I keep hearing more and more organizations urging that their leaders learn the art of “story telling” – the emotional and passionate style of communicating in a way that is impactful, inspiring and of course persuasive.

Needless to say, Coaches are asked if they have in their tool kit a tool to help their coachees unleash the power of story telling.

It is indeed useful to learn how to communicate in a way that your style does not compromise on the substance that you have – I repeat, your style of communicating does not do injustice to your substance. This is great. In other words, story telling is about your ability to help others see things as good as they really are.

But I must warn that like all strengths and skills, this one is not to be overused or used in a way that is “untruthful”.

The opposite of “story telling” to me is “success theatre”. It is a phrase of caution often used by John Flannery, CEO of GE in response to what he saw leaders at GE engage in. ” No more success theater” he is quoted as saying.

I have seen Leaders engage in story telling and I have also seen leaders engage in success theatre. When I listened to story telling, I had goose bumps. When I listened to success theatre, I did not know where to look.

I also think that there are times when the line is thin.

Many pundits are predicting that 2023 will be less success theatre for some and some good story telling for some others.

What do you think?