Why and I afraid to tell you who you are?
What comes in the way of building and nurturing authentic relationships at work or in our personal lives?
What comes in the way of being honest with another person, albeit in a responsible way?
This is a topic I certainly grapple with all the time I am sure many of you do.
To answer this question, I am drawn to one of the very, very first books on this subject I read, well over 40 years ago, written by John Powell SJ, published in 1969. And the book goes by the title “Why Am I Afraid to Tell You Who I Am?”
He actually asks a total stranger this question, “Why am I afraid to tell you who I am?”
He asks, “Can you answer this question?”
And that other person says, unrehearsed, “I’m afraid to tell you who I am because if I tell you who I am, you may not like who I am and it’s all that I have.”
That is the kind of fear that prevents people from being authentic in self-disclosure.
If I turn the question around a little bit and ask, “Why am I afraid to tell you who I think you are and what you’re doing?” what would be your answers?
I’d really like to read your responses here.
I’d like to start by sharing a few first:
✅I’m not sure how to say it to you. I don’t think I have that skill.
✅It’s too much work. I just don’t have the bandwidth to get into this.
✅It may spoil the transactional relationship that is keeping us going.
✅You may not like what I am going to say.
✅You may disagree with what I am saying and end up rejecting me and therefore it appears convenient to not tell you who I think you are but carry that impression in my mind forever, judging you every single day.
I’d really love to know why you are afraid to tell someone who they are and what they do?
Youtube link: https://youtu.be/WvF4xLVL5W8
Video Link: https://www.dropbox.com/scl/fi/4gf0o6i4zo08qv0krxjei/Building-and-Nurturing-Authentic-Relationship.mp4?rlkey=mkz0wxawj8opyj71pnzb6skdd&st=fel0sg84&dl=0
